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Artist :Afroman
Album :The Good Times
Title :

Crazy Rap



(Wait a minuteman. Heycheck this outtell it. It was this blind manright?
Mancheck this out- it was this blind manright?
He was feelin' his way down the street with this stickright?
Hey. He walked past this fish marketyou know what I'm sayin'?
He stoppedhe took a deep breathhe said
Woooooogood morningladies.
You like that shitman? HeymanI got a gang of that shitman.
I tell you what- my man on the guitarfool on the drums
everybody just crowd around the micI'll tell you all these mutha-fuckin' jokes.
But firstI'ma start it off like this. Heyhelp me sing ithomeboy.)
Colt 45 and two Zig Zagsbaby that's all we need.
We can go to the park after darksmoke that tumbleweed.
And as the marijuana burns we can take our turnssinging them dirty rap songs
Stop and hit the bong like Cheech and Chongsell tapes from here to Hong Kong.
So rollrollroll my joint. Pick out the seeds and stems.
Feelin' high as hell flyin' through Palmdaleskatin' on Dayton rims.
So rollroll the '83 Cadillac Coup de Ville.
If my tapes and my cds just don't sellI bet my caddy will.

Well it was just sundown in a small white town. They call it Eastside Palmdale.
When the Afroman walked through the white landhouses went up for sale.
WellI was standin' on the corner sellin' rap cds when I met a little girl named Jan.
I let her ride in my Caddy cause I didn't know her daddy was the leader of the Klu Klux Klan.
We fucked on the bedfucked on the flo'fucked so longI grew a fuckin' afro.
Then I fucked to the leftfucked to the right. She sucked my dick 'til the shit turned white.
I thought to myselfShebaSheba! Got my ass lookin' like a ZEBRA!
I pulled on my clothes and I was on my wayuntil her daddy pulled up in a Chevrolet.
I ran. I jumped out the back windowbut her daddyhe was waitin' with a 2 x 4.
Ohhe beat me to the lefthe beat me to the right. The mutha-fucker whooped my ass all night.
But I ain't mad at her prejudiced dadthat's the best damn pussy I ever had.
I got a bag of weed and a bottle of wine. I'm a fuck that bitch just one more time.

Colt 45 and two Zig Zagsbaby that's all we need.
We can go to the park after darksmoke that tumbleweed.
And as the marijuana burns we can take our turnssinging them dirty rap songs
Stop and hit the bong like Cheech and Chongsell tapes from here to Hong Kong.
So rollrollroll my joint. Pick out the seeds and stems.
Feelin' high as hell flyin' through Palmdaleskatin' on Dayton rims.
So rollroll the '83 Cadillac Coup de Ville.
If my tapes and my cds just don't sellI bet my caddy will.

I met this lady in Hollywood. She had green hairbut damn she looked good.
I took her to my housecause she was finebut she whipped out a dick that was bigger than mine.
I met this lady from Japannever made love with an African.
I fucked her onceI fucked her twice. I ate that pussy like shrimp fried rice.
Don't be amazed at the stories I tell ya. I met a woman in the heart of Australia.
Had a big butt and big tittiestooso I hopped in her ass like a kangaroo.
SeeI met this lady from Hawaii. Stuck it in her assand she saidAiiiiieeee!
Lips was breakfastpussy was lunchthen her titties busted open with Hawaiian Punch.
Met Colonel Sander's wife in the state of Kentucky. She saidI'll fry some chicken if you just fuck me.
I came in her mouth. It was a crisis. I gave her my secret blend of herbs and spices.

Colt 45 and two Zig Zagsbaby that's all we need.
We can go to the park after darksmoke that tumbleweed.
And as the marijuana burns we can take our turnssinging them dirty rap songs
Stop and hit the bong like Cheech and Chongsell tapes from here to Hong Kong.
Heywait a minute mancheck this out.

I met Dolly Parton in Tennessee. Her titties were filled with Hennesy.
That country music nearly drove me crazybut I rode that ass and saidYesMiss Daisy!
Met this lady in Oklahoma; put that pussy in a coma.
Met this lady in Michigan; I can't wait 'til I fuck that bitch again.
Met a real black girl in South Carolina; fucked her 'til she turned into a white albino.
Fucked this hooker in Iowa. I fucked her on creditso I owe her.
Fucked this girldown in Georgia; came in her mouth. ManI thought I told ya.
Met this beautiful sexy ho; she just ran cross the border of Mexico.
Fine young thingsaid her name's Maria. I wrapped her up just like a Hot Tortilla.
I wanna get marriedbut I can't afford it. I know I'ma cry when she gets deported.

Colt 45 and two Zig Zagsbaby that's all we need.
We can go to the park after darksmoke that tumbleweed.
And as the marijuana burns we can take our turnssinging them dirty rap songs
Stop and hit the bong like Cheech and Chongsell tapes from here to Hong Kong.

Have you ever went over to a girl's house to fuckbut the pussy just ain't no good? (SAY WHAT?)
And then you're getting' upset cause you can't get her wetplus you in the wrong neighborhood?
So you try to play it off and eat the pussybut it takes her so long to come (SAY WHAT?)
Then a dude walks in. That's her big boyfriendand he asks you where you from? (Where you fromman?)
So you wipe your mouthand you try to explain (I don't bang.)you start talkin' real fast.
But he's already madcause you fuckin' his wifeso he starts beatin' on your ass.
Now your clothes all muddyyour nose all bloodyyour dick was hard but now it's soft. (WHUT?)
You thought you had a girl to rock your worldnow you still gotta go jack off.

Colt 45 and two Zig Zagsbaby that's all we need.
We can go to the park after darksmoke that tumbleweed.
[fade out]

 



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